O’HARE TO DOWNTOWN IN 15 MINUTES?! BABY, I’LL JUST LEAVE YESTERDAY 😂

📍CHICAGO, IL | Lady Red for 730 BOOM Radio

Chicago is talking about getting you from O’Hare to downtown in FIFTEEN MINUTES.

FIFTEEN?!

Baby, I don't know if I wanna go that damn fast ANYWHERE. 😂

I'll just leave YESTERDAY.

I'm old-school. If my flight leaves Tuesday morning, I'm finna start getting dressed Sunday night. I don't need to be shooting across Chicago at 80 mph with my luggage looking at me like:

“B***H, WHERE WE GOING?!” 😭😂

But Chicago business and civic leaders have unveiled plans for something called the O’Hare Flyer, a privately funded battery-electric express train that they say could travel between O’Hare and downtown Chicago in about 15 minutes.

And here's the part that's gonna have Chicago's chronically late people somewhere SHOOK:

The trains would leave every 15 minutes.

Ohhhhh, NOW we talking.

Because this ain't just about the airport anymore.

Some of y'all who are late EVERY DAMN DAY just lost your last excuse. 😂

You know who you are.

"Traffic was crazy."

"The Kennedy was backed up."

"It took forever getting downtown."

NOT NO MORE, POOH.

If they can shoot somebody from O'Hare to downtown in 15 minutes, your supervisor is gonna be standing at the time clock like:

“So what happened TODAY, Keisha?” 😭😂😂😂

The proposed O’Hare Flyer would travel between a station near the Old Post Office downtown and O’Hare Terminal 2, using existing freight railroad rights-of-way. The plan calls for electric trains running on dedicated tracks, with comfortable seating and luggage racks.

And apparently they're trying to make it fancy.

Not just get on this train, sit down and hold your suitcase between your knees transportation.

They're talking about an airport-focused experience with comfortable seats, luggage storage and possibly even being able to check your bags downtown.

WAIT A MINUTE.

You mean I might be able to drop my luggage off downtown and tell it:

“I'll see yo ass in Atlanta.”

Okayyyyyyy. 😂

Now THAT part I like.

But before everybody starts standing outside the Old Post Office tomorrow morning waiting on this train, PUT YOUR COAT BACK ON.

This thing ain't built yet.

The proposal carries an estimated $2.25 billion price tag, still needs agreements involving railroad rights-of-way, regulatory and city approvals, financing and a whole lot of other grown-folks paperwork before anybody goes flying toward O'Hare. The developers say their goal is to have it operating within about five years.

And Chicago has heard this song before.

We've been talking about a super-fast downtown-to-O'Hare connection for YEARS. There was even that Elon Musk proposal that was supposed to get folks there in about 12 minutes.

We see how far we got with THAT.

Exactly.

NOWHERE. 😂

Meanwhile, the CTA Blue Line is sitting over there like:

“So I guess 45 minutes ain't good enough for y'all no more?” 😭

The Blue Line currently takes roughly 40 to 45 minutes between O'Hare and downtown and operates 24 hours a day.

So yes, cutting that trip down to 15 minutes would be a BIG deal.

Especially for tourists.

Business travelers.

People trying to catch flights.

And most importantly...

THE MFs WHO ARE ALWAYS LATE.

😂😂😂

Because if Chicago actually builds this thing, I don't wanna hear NOTHING.

Not “traffic.”

Not “the expressway.”

Not “I got caught behind a truck.”

Ma'am, Chicago just built you a damn electric spaceship on railroad tracks.

GET TO WORK.

As for me?

Y'all can have the 15-minute express.

I'm gonna leave the house four hours early, buy me some Garrett Popcorn, find my gate, charge my phone, reorganize my purse twice and sit there looking at everybody running through the airport like:

“Should've left yesterday.” 😂

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